The beginning of a dream fulfilled

I am so excited I can hardly stand it. I am going to begin the courses for my Master's Degree!

For decades I have known that I wanted to get formal Bible School training, but the time and the finances were never right. Recently I went to Elmbrook Church's Christian Study Center website and began to poke around. Today I talked to Dave Seemuth, and it appears that this degree is a perfect fit. I am going to register to get a Master of Arts in Christian Studies, and begin in January with the New Testament Survey class. Honestly, I am SO EXCITED that I want it to start tomorrow.

I'll take a break from teaching for this first semester, to pace myself and to have time to study for this four credit class. The fully accredited degree will be through Trinity Divinity School in Deerfield, IL, but I can take every class at Elmbrook church which is 5 minutes from my work. 42 credits total.

Issues:
Time: I study a lot now. I think it may be a wash.
Money: God has graciously provided through a raise at work. While there are a million other uses for money, this is a good one. Each credit at Elmbrook is $265, while the same class at the seminary is over $600 per credit hour. Such a blessing to have the resource of that church right here.
Home: My husband is all for it, as he knows that study is what fuels me.
Laptop: My work ordered me a brand new lap top today (mine is slow and dying a very colorful death...the screen is swirly pink much of the time...) and it will be my personal as well as my work laptop. It is FAST FAST FAST.
Logos Bible Software: All paid for (did the six months free financing) and I have learned how to really use some of it's features...this will be a big time saver as well as a space saver.

I am feeling total peace about signing up. And SO excited. We went to Elmbrook tonight to look at the text books in the book store, but I can order them at a substantial discount through Amazon.

Woo hoo. I just can't wait!

King David

I'm not doing so well on blogging about the Advent study. At the moment I'm juggling two studies: Advent and the Names of God, and while I'm LOVING it and almost keeping up, the time to blog has been usurped. But here I am for a quickie before bed.

Today I was reading about David, the shepherd boy, the slayer of Goliath, the adulterer and murderer, and the man after God's own heart. What a character! One of the assigned verses was this one:

1 Ch 28:9 “As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a whole heart and a willing mind; for the Lord searches all hearts, and understands every intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will let you find Him; but if you forsake Him, He will reject you forever.

How blessed for David to be able to tell his son to "know the God of your father." We can't fool our kids! I want our children to know, without a doubt, Who is the God of their mother. (and father) And not only who He is, but I too want them to know Him. That is the most important legacy there is.

Whole heart and willing mind. Willing mind. Are we willing to do what He tells us?

For the Lord searches all hearts, and understands every intent of the thoughts. This phrase gives me great comfort as well as reason to pause. The comfort is that unlike people, God always understands me and my intentions. When I'm trying, successfully or not, to do His will or carry out His best plan, He knows it. When I totally blow something, He knows that that was not my intention, and He understands my original intent. That is comforting. HOWEVER, I can't fool Him. I can fool a lot of people, but I can't fool God with any false religiosity...He searches my heart and knows my intent. Give it up, Grace.

If you seek Him, He will let you find Him. Wonderful comfort. Warm fuzzies.
If you forsake Him He will reject you forever. No sugar coating here.

Life is all about choices. The Bible is all about choices. Choose God and choose the path of blessing. Choose other than God and choose the path of curses. It's simple.

Simple though the choices be, I find it reassuring that God so used David in spite of himself. Gives us all hope, doesn't it?

Purse Addiction

A friend sent me this card and it cracks me up.
Um...have I mentioned a penchant for classy bags?

Savoring Sunday

Yes, Sunday should have been blogged BEFORE Monday... sorry.
After church I was blue. Mainly tired, but blue. The sun was bright, so I decided to just snug in a sun puddle and read and nap the afternoon away. It's been a rough week, so that seemed a good plan.

I brought the "Queen Chair" in to our bedroom to the wall of south facing windows that overlook a garden path area and the woods beyond (an amazing view to which to awaken) . It's a slingback folding chair that I used to take camping; it reclines at just the right angle, has a perfect pillow...it fits me just right. Somewhere along the way my buddies named it the Queen chair as they'd see me relaxing in style at the campfire. Ha.

So as I sat basking in the sun and pretending to read, I saw a few birds swooping about. Since I have not baked more seed for the feeders, I thought I should at least clean out the bird bath. I went out and scrubbed it, hosed it and filled it. Having spent a good chunk of Saturday pulling out annuals and putting away garden decor, the bird bath was all that called me on Sunday. Back to the queen chair.

What happened next can only be described as a God given pocket of joy. Over a dozen birds arrived. A couple robins, a couple woodpeckers, one ruby red cardinal, and a mixture of sparrows: some brown, some with reddish heads and chests, and some with blue. The bird world must be thirsty because my little bird bath was THE place to be. For a good 40 minutes I rested while being mesmerized by the shenanigans of my feathered friends. The sparrows had the most fun: they hopped right in, fluffing their feathers and taking full baths. In 5 years of owning this birdbath (my mother loved it so...I had to keep it when I cleaned out her home) I have occasionally seen a bird take a sip. Yesterday it was a veritable bird spa.

The whole experience energized me, and I ended up washing the bedroom windows inside and out, and also the master bath window. I hung three little beaded snowflakes in the bathroom window where they will catch the light all winter. Tiny things, really, but part of my refreshment. The tiny little details in a room bring me such pleasure. Today, Monday, I've literally been "lifted" by seeing those sparkling clean windows with tiny beaded ornaments. Details. Pockets of Joy.

Thank you Father for lifting my spirits. Thank you for health, for relative wealth, for a home, for the gift of time. I am so blessed. Even on a bluish day.

Marvelous Monday

Today is delicious.

Perhaps because I’ve had fewer days off recently, I am increasingly appreciative when I have a whole day to putter.

It began slow. As I contemplated getting out of bed, I wondered if I’d get anything done at all today. I realize that the stress of last week is weighing on me a bit, so I took it slow – because I could. I gave myself a break. A cup of Nescafe began to wake me as I threw in a load of wash. I try to work on my Bible studies first thing, so I set up at the dining room table.

And that is when the magic began. I would read and write a bit, and then do a chore or two. When I needed to sit, I did…more studying and pondering the amazing names of God. This is now my preferred pace rather than a list: whatever gets done gets done. And wow…the day just stretched on and on. That is the definition of a delicious day: the hours stretch out as I putter.

It is SO warm out, (72!) so washing windows became a priority. The living room, kitchen and half bath are done, inside and out. I moved a mulch pile and redug the earth to balance the bird bath…little garden putters that I see out the bedroom window. The winter is long, and I will appreciate having taken the time to add beauty to the gardens. The wash is done and even put away. Meals are sort of planned, papers are recycled, items picked up and put away…all at a snail’s pace while sipping coffee and studying for 20 minute breaks in between. Oh, there's plenty left to do - but it's been a good days work.

Days like today need to be savored and recorded. The blessings of a warm fall day, a lovely home (with a zillion windows) and time in silence to think and ponder. No music, no tv, no phone…just me and God and His word and our home. Perfection.

Advent

Our SAMBS group (Saturday AM Bible Study) (Sassy lambs) began our new study, Preparing My Heart for Advent yesterday, for the second consecutive year. While it doesn't seem possible that we should be preparing for Advent, it is so very lovely to begin the journey in the relatively stress free month of November.

My plan is to share some of the Advent journey via blog.

Day Two today. The assignment is to read Luke 1 through 2:40, and write questions. Who, what, why, how, where. The purpose? To slow down and study. Savor. Savor His word and His company.

They were both righteous in the sight of God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and requirements of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizbeth was barren, and they were both advanced in years. Luke 1:6-7

Righteousness does not guarantee perfect circumstance. Righteousness does not preclude longing. Longing does not preclude living within God's will.

Sometimes the wait is long, even when the longing is God given. They were both advanced in years.

Tears fill my eyes as I highlight the angel's message:

Do not be afraid...your petition has been heard...You will have joy and gladness, and many will rejoice... Luke 1:13-14.

My heart is full from just these few verses. Live righteously in spite of the longings. Keep praying. Live expectantly. Keep hope. God hears.
Amen!

Starbucks

Words and Coffee...a winning combination.
Here are some wall murals I've found at Starbucks:

Signs of the Times

I do love words, so I stop and take pictures of great signs. Enjoy.

At a local hospital:

At a restaurant in Lacrosse:

In Kenosha:

At a shop in Genessee:

Mod Podge

Mixed media art intrigues me. That's about as far as it has gotten...the intrigue. Actually, I have made a few cards this fall, using some ribbon, some stickers, sewing a few seed beads on... they turned out well, and I enjoyed the minorly artistic endeavor.

Recently Emily, our college sophomore, sent me this card, proudly sharing that it is made of almost all recycled materials. I'm impressed. The card itself is made from a grocery bag, and the leaves on the tree are individually cut from colorful magazine ads...she herself called it a major bit of "study procrastination." Works of art do take time you know!

The glitter is held in place by...you guessed it...Mod Podge.


I remember Mod Podge from junior high. My friend Karla and I would decoupage pictures onto small wooden plaques. Do you remember that fad? Who knew that Mod Podge still existed?

Today I bought two jars - one plain matte and one in hologram gold glitter. (we didn't have that in junior high!!) Tonight, while watching an old movie, I cut up a magazine to create two cards: photo collages of autumn flowers, pumpkins, and gourds, all compliments of Better Homes & Gardens. Both are glittered Mod Podge style, and I'm feeling quite accomplished...

At Borders Bookstore earlier I was perusing magazines on mixed media art. It's simply amazing what people think to do. One article detailed the process one artist goes through starting with a photocopy of an old family photo. She adds layers of paints, pencil, fabrics, tulle, blush, crayon, feathers, whatever...until there is a work of collage art rather than the photo. Such creativity. I do, however, wonder who might buy this type of art. With the time involved I can certainly understand the phrase, "starving artist." I've written before about "The Artful Blogger" magazine which touts some fabulous pages from artist's blogs. A whole blog world is out there, an online gallery. Is mixed media art relatively new? Crazy quilts preceded it - were there other forms of mixed media?

Creativity is good for my spirits, and I hope that the card recipients feel special for having received a one of a kind message from me. Recycled contents. That's good too. Rather than buy alphabet stickers I can cut and paste podge. The possibilities are endless!

Tinkerbell

Our 16 year old was one of the birthday girls at a shared "Sweet 16" party tonight. The party was held at her friend's house, so we supplied the cake and the pizza. Since the theme was Disney Characters, we chose a cake full of Disney Princesses.

Our Anna dressed as Tinkerbell. Imagine my surprise when Anna gave me my list this morning. She asked me to pick up: 1. Cake ( preordered) 2. Pantyhose 3. Wings (!!!) and 4. a gift card for her friend.

Happily, my local Walgreens stocks wings this time of year. Who knew?

Good News

The CT yesterday showed an "atypical hemangioma" in my liver. In English, that is a clump of blood vessels. I will need to go back in 6 months for another scan to see if it is "stable," but otherwise there is nothing to worry about.

Thank you Lord.

Annie Freeman's Fabulous Traveling Funeral

What a gift to have a fabulous read on such a stressful day. As I awaited my CT (1.5 hours of wait) and then later at the hospital while my father had surgery (he is recovering well) I was thoroughly engrossed in this wonderful novel by Kris Radish.

The story line is that an extraordinary woman dies and four of her closest friends are thrown together to spread her ashes far and wide on a trip that is completely preplanned by the deceased.

I have two notecards of quotes I loved...I always read with a pencil in hand, but since this book is from the library I wrote on notecards rather than in the margins!

A quote that seemed so appropriate for today is on page 148: "Annie's death on top of what happened with your mom, that's a lot.""What's a lot though?""Whatever you can or can't handle I suppose....Everyone has a different level of 'what's a lot.'"

Today was a lot: a lot of emotionally charged activity. But God got me through it. So many friends texted and emailed to say they were praying for me, and that's what got me through.

That and an amazing read.

CT Scan

Today I had an abdominal CT scan. I have no results yet.

This is what it looks like

First, fully gowned, they had me lay on the bed with pillows under my head and a wedge under my knees. It was very comfortable, and I was amazingly relaxed. (Thank you for the prayers!)Next they drew blood to check my kidney creatnine level. Thankfully it was well within normal range, so they could add the necessary "contrast" solution. Evidently the contrast is quite hard on the kidneys as they flush it from the system. In the same needle poke they inserted a small tube to use as an IV for the "contrast." Since I have terribly small veins, it took two pokes for the IV, but that is pretty good for me! (Needless to say I dread getting blood work...)

I layed on the bed, and eventually was asked to put my hands over my head. The bed moved back and forth, taking me in and out of the tube. A computerized voice told me when to breathe and when to hold my breath. Amazing.

One set of scans was taken without contrast. That took maybe 3 minutes total. The tech came and added the contrast through the IV in my arm, telling me I would feel warmth in my throat, and then throughout my abdomen. And wow - she was right on. I had no sooner said my throat felt warm than my groin was hot and everything else in between. The next set of scans was quickly taken, and minutes later I was sitting up and feeling normal. The flush of heat was over as fast as it came on.

And that was that. They are looking at the mass they found in my liver which was measured at 7 cm by 5cm by 3 cm. That's BIG! I've googled "liver mass" and read all kinds of options...I should know the results of my scan by tomorrow. Hopefully is it a hemangioma - a cluster of blood vessels. I'm pretty sure that would require no further action.

I do not know what the future holds, but I know Him who holds my future! I'm exhausted, but calm and ready for a good night's sleep.

The Silver Linings

I stayed in Wausau, WI last night, having driven up at 4 pm with my boss and a favorite coworker. Had a fancy schmancy meal, and was back in my hotel room by 10 pm to drift off to sleep in an amazing bed. The toiletries were Aveda, and the coffee bags for the four cup pot were Starbucks: those are both VERY good signs in a hotel.

At the restaurant I had to order carefully. Silver lining: I'm going to lose weight and feel better. Silver lining...I must remember that silver lining.

Why? Well, about 1.5 weeks ago I began to have some pretty serious stomach pain. Right under my rib cage on the left side. Four evenings in a row. The only relief was laying down. Sometimes the pain shot through to my back like a sword going right through me.

Off to the doctor I went. Blood work. Extensive ultrasounds.

My pancreas enzymes are slightly elevated. Although my pancreas and gallbladder look ok now, my symptoms most resemble pancreatitis. I've been told this is common in 40-something women. Perhaps I threw a gallstone. Don't know. But for now, no alcohol and no fatty food. Pancreatitis is nothing to play with, and my system needs to rest.

Hmmmm. Diabetes keeps me low carb. Now I'm low fat too. And no alcohol. Not even cough syrup. Yipes.

And so, a bit of the fun was stolen from the fancy restaurant as my choices were awfully limited. I chose hot mint decaf tea, and a pasta with chicken, broccoli and broiled tomatoes. Most of the dinner left my system before bed(SIGH) , and the tea woke me a few times as well. (I drank too much because I was feeling sorry for myself as my dinner companions had drinks and wine ...)

However, and this IS a silver lining, I felt good this morning. Less bloated. Cleaner. Clearer. Six to eight weeks of this will likely make a difference!

Another silver lining: they found an abnormality in my liver. Why would that be good? Well, if it's something about which to concern myself, it's amazing that they found it now, as it likely has nothing to do with my pain -- it just showed up by accident in the ultrasounds. Now there is a CT scheduled this week. The mass is likely a hemangioma - a benign clump of blood vessels. But in order to be sure they need the CAT scan.

I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself, but trying to remember the silver linings. And I am taking more couch time than usual. Right now I'm nestled with a stack of books and a quilt...a bit of pain, but mostly just feeling the need to be still and to rest my body.

I left my current read in my boss' car. Sigh. I was wrapped in a blanket in his back seat all the way home, reading Annie Freeman's Fabulous Traveling Funeral by Kris Radish. I am LOVING it - a story about the deep friendship of women.

The silver lining of leaving it behind? I blogged instead of reading the evening away...

Is Abortion an Important Issue?

I've heard the argument that abortion should not be the most important issue affecting a person's vote.

I just found this link to the candidate's stances, and after watching it, I find it hard to deny that Barack Obama finds it to be an important issue. Note the "Planned Parenthood" banners. Note his own words on his priority in the first day of office.

This is sobering.

This is not just an artificial issue drummed up by conservatives. This is obviously an important issue to both sides.

Watch this. Listen to the candidates' own words. Shut your eyes to the photos if you think they are too religious...just listen to the candidates' own words.

Trust

Our Thursday night study is studying Lord I Want to Know You by Kay Arthur. In Day 11's homework I found reference to this verse:

Psalm 9:10
And those who know Thy name will put their trust in Thee; For Thou, O LORD, hast not forsaken those who seek Thee.

What perfect encouragement to continue to seek to know Him more - to know Him by name. The word "trust" in the Hebrew is Strong's number 982: Batach. The Lexical Aid includes: "...to attach oneself, to trust, to confide in, feel safe, be confident, secure, to be careless; ...associated with firmness or solidity...The word expresses the sense of well being which results from knowing that the rug won't be pulled out from under you....Confident expectation...We can truly relax when we know WHO is in control."

Trust. I will admit that I struggle with trust. In the most tender areas of my life I must wonder if God really does have my best in mind...although intellectually I know He does. But I don't feel it. Trust. As I think on it, I struggle with His Sovereign will versus my poor choices. Trust.

In the simple things...like the economy or terrorism...those things don't cause me any lost sleep...I have full confidence that He is in control. And I have none. There's comfort in that!

Trust. I want to trust Him, confide in Him, feel safe with Him... Trust.

The Journey

This photo is of a path near our old home...a path Boomer and I walked hundreds of times. It reminds me of life's journey. While there is plenty of beauty and wonder in the here and now, we have positively no idea of what might be around the corner...
In the photo, for instance, the path leads to a man made lake - a treasure in the suburbs, and a walker's delight.

The G List - part 1

Some days I need to keep counting my blessings. And so a new category of blogs today: The G List. Good, Great, Grin-producing, Godly, Giggle-inducing, Gorgeous, Glamorous, ...and all other positive G words combined...

This week end's list:

-Meeting our 16 year old's first boyfriend. He looks so young and so innocent. (Thank God!)

-Buying cranberries at the grocery store, our 19 year old, Em, asked if they were for the Thanksgiving sauce. Yes was my reply. She lamented that she wished she could stay home and make the sauce with me. It's amazing how sentimental she has become.

-Em walking through the house on Friday evening, studying the details, and then settling into the familiar overstuffed leather couch. "I'm so glad you decorate for the seasons, " she said. (who IS this girl??)

-The new zinnias bravely pushing out petals in late October. They are healthy and happy and five feet tall. Each morning I look out the window to see if they made it through another chilly night. So far so good.

-My October Starbucks drink:

Grande
Nonfat
Pumpkin Spice Latte
2 pumps pumpkin
2 pumps sugar free vanilla
one shot of protein
with whip

Substituting half sugar free flavoring doesn't distract too much from the taste, and halves the grams of sugar. Although it's a mouthful to place my order, the result is worth it. Honestly, all is well with the world during those first few sips.

-Finding the New York Times Sunday edition on our steps for the first time. I ordered just the Sunday paper for 12 weeks at an intro price of $3.60 a week. (It's $5 at Starbucks) And during the 12 weeks I have access to the NYT crossword puzzles online, and the total archive of past puzzles are there to down load and/or print. Sunday afternoons are becoming cherished couch time with that silly NYT crossword. It's SO addicting.

-Singing in the quintet on Sunday. What a gift it is to make such music.

-Sitting in my spot on a rare Monday morning off work. Such simple luxury.

-Playing Scrabble with our 12 year old on Saturday night. We played for an hour and a half, and he did GREAT. I helped him a bit with strategy, and assisted when he was stuck, but overall he kept pace and made some awesome plays all on his own. I know that he has watched me and his 21 year old brother play, and this was a sort of rite of passage. It filled me up as well.

-Cooking five meals today. It feels right to prioritize that, and while I'm not sure I actually *grinned,* I am grinning now when I open my fridge and see them there. It takes the pressure off the week.

-Reading an article on writing memoirs in an Oprah magazine read at the hair salon. The article was so good, and the accompanying pages of memoirs so tempting, that I *borrowed* the magazine to finish it tonight. (August 2008 edition) Yes, I do plan to sneak it back into the salon. (although they'll likely be tossing August soon anyhow, no?)

-Sleeping under the quilt with 40 degree air coming in the window. Autumn. Mmmmmm.

Simple Sacrifice

To You I shall offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving,
And call upon the name of the Lord. Psalm 116:17

This morning in my quiet moments I read Psalm 116. The word "sacrifice" carries such difficult and unpleasant connotations, but here the sacrifice is thanksgiving combined with calling on the name of the Lord. Is that not a commentary on man? Just thanking God requires sacrifice: the sacrifice of time, of thought, of intention, and of giving up the urge to complain and whine.

I was reminded of another verse in Hebrews:

Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name. Hebrews 13:15

Again, the sacrifice is so simple: the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name. The author commands it *continually.*

Continually? Is this true of me? Is this true of you?

Let's work on sacrifice today. Let's continually offer up thanks to God rather than offering grumbling to our fellow man. Could we do it for a whole day?

Sweet Sixteen

Our baby girl, third child of four, is sixteen today. Her oldest brother came home from college to lunch with us, along with my future daughter-in-law his girlfiend. We dined on grilled salmon with home made mashed potatoes and corn, all at the birthday girl's request. And she didn't want a cake...so...I made my late mother's famous brownie recipe. The brownies have a fudge glaze that is quite amazing! Juanita didn't bake a lot, but when she did have to take something to a party, everyone requested her brownies.


Juanita's Brownies

Cream together:
1/2 cup butter
1 cup sugar

and then beat in:
4 eggs

Add:
1- 16 oz can Hershey's syrup
1/2 cup chopped nuts
1 cup flour

Spray a jelly roll pan (flat pan with edges) and pour batter in.
Bake at 325 for 35 minutes

Fudge Glaze:

Mix in saucepan:
1 & 1/3 cup sugar
6 Tablespoons butter
6 Tablespoons milk

Bring to a boil and boil one minute.
Take off the heat and mix in

3/4 cup *real* chocolate chips
1/2 teaspoon vanilla

Stir and stir and stir until thickened but pourable. (I sit the saucepan in a frying pan of ice and water after the chips are melted and all is mixed...careful not to get even a drop of water in the glaze)

Pour over the brownies in the pan and smooth quickly with a spatula. Let glaze harden a bit before cutting, though you might want to score the glaze while it's still warm.