Christmas Eve

"This is the eve of something wonderful - the eve of celebrating the nearness and closeness of Immanuel." Preparing My Heart for Advent by Ann Marie Stewart.

Niece Night

For the second year in a row we invited the six younger nieces over to bake and craft on December 23. An hour ahead I wondered WHY?!? But an hour after I was basking in the sweetness.

Six little girls from age 6 to 12 ... who knew the results. But they were giggling and happy and cooperative and sweet the entire three hours. What a delight. Cousin time.

Emily chose Kiss-mouse decorations (yum) and stringed popcorn for her part of the evening. (Anna was at work.) Aunt Grace chose journaling. If I instill the thought of journaling year by year...perhaps they will pick up on this enriching habit some day...

I purchased Composition Notebooks and some Heat n Bond. They got to pick fabric from the Aunt Grace stash, and then we heat n bonded it to the front of the notebooks. Back upstairs at the dining room table they got to sticker and cut and paste and write. And giggle. Lots of giggles.

I was amazed at how they enjoyed it. No one was bored. They were disappointed to clean up at 9:30. They all promised to bring their journals back next year, and I promised to have new ones and new supplies. Now that I know what a hit this was, I think a little kit will be assembled throughout the year for each of them. [I was hoping to assemble a fun journal kit or two this year, but picked SIX BOY NAMES in the family exchange. Sigh]

There's a lot of hustle and bustle of the season that comes and goes. But investing in people...that gives back more to my heart than the time invested. An evening well spent. An Aunt Grace legacy begun...

merry kiss-mouse

the littlest niece, Sydney

Stringing garland

Journal time!

2011

During my reading this morning I was reminded of Luke 1:37,

"For nothing is impossible with God."

What an amazing truth.

Right then and there I opened the 2011 Moleskine and put it on the inside front cover - a happy smattering of mismatch stickers. My motto for 2011...and beyond. My mantra. What I will learn to say under my breath...

My 2010 red Moleskine journal is literally bursting at the seams. What a year. It will be like putting a dear friend on the shelf...

Reading the Word, writing, journaling, pondering...I love it all. I take time most mornings, and it is my homemade therapy. Maybe 2011 is the year of the journal for you?

Christmas

Here's a peek at Christmas decor 2010...

Welcome! Come on in!

Sorry...Boomer is too comfy to greet you.

The tree and the fire are at the center of everything...

Peeking at the tree through the family room French door...

The dining room table gets a lot of use at this time of year, too.

I just LOVE Christmas. Everything about it. Celebrate!

Do You Hear what I Hear?

A beloved memory of mine is my older brother Jon (13 years my elder) sitting me on the piano as a little girl. He would play and sing "Do you hear what I hear?" and I would be the echo.

My devotional reading today reminded me to listen during this wondrous season. Listen more, talk less. Sounds like a plan. Right now I hear the roar of the fire...a favorite sound. And I hear Boomer snoring...he is sprawled out near the heat of the flames. Cherished morning sounds. Tonight I will hear the symphony and symphony chorus perform The Messiah. I'm in tears thinking about it. That music, those words...it moves me.

Zephaniah 3:17

17 The Lord your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.

My devotional asks, in reference to this verse, "Are you quiet enough to hear God singing over you?" What a timely question.

I'm going to listen more today.

Advent

Twice in the last day I've been asked if I know of a good advent devotional. Twice I've referred them to my advent blog of a few years ago. So, if you're looking for a small daily reading, try http://advent-ful.blogspot.com

I'm going to revisit it too, and add comments here and there...so...read the comments for new insights. And PLEASE...leave a comment and your own thouhgts as well.

More presence

This morning my Bible reading took me to another gem.

Psalms 31:20 NASB
20 You hide them in the secret place of Your presence from the conspiracies of man;
You keep them secretly in a shelter from the strife of tongues.

Did you see that phrase? "...the secret place of Your presence..." What a treasure! No matter what is swirling around us, what others may be saying or plotting, we can look away, breathe His name, and be swept under His wing to the place of secret presence.

Presence. I just can't get enough of it.

Presence

This morning as I studied in 1 Samuel 21:1-9, I came across the account of David eating the Bread of the Presence which was given to him by the priest.

Beth Moore had the following observation, "The everlasting covenant symbolized by the bread of the Presence was a reminder of the pledge of God's presence to His people. As he offered bread to David through Ahimelech the priest, I believe God pledged His presence to David throughout his exile and promised to be his complete sustainer." (p. 110 of David, 90 Days with a Heart Like His)

This resonates with me. Of all God's gifts, one of His greatest is presence. His presence. Here with me.

Emmanuel is one of my favorite words for Christ.

Matthew 1:23, "'...AND THEY SHALL CALL HIS NAME IMMANUEL, ' which translated means "GOD WITH US."

What a gift. What a sustenance. Christ is the bread of God's presence to and in us.

Recently in church I sang the song, "In the Presence of Jehovah," which has some of the most powerful words I've ever sung. It could be the theme song for any future speaking I might do. The lyrics so aptly describe what I find to be true.

In and out of situations

That tug-a-war in me

All day long I struggle

For answers that I need

Then I come into His presence

All my questions become clear

And for a sacred moment

No doubt can interfere.

In the presence of Jehovah

God Almighty Prince of Peace

Troubles vanish

hearts are mended

in the presence of the King

Through His love the Lord provided

A place for us to rest

A place to find the answers

In hours of distress

So now there’s never any reason

To give up in despair

Just look away and breathe His name

He will come and meet you there.

Presence. Nothing this world offers compares to experiencing the presence of the Almighty from moment to moment. As temptations and trials and worries press from every side, I truly need to "look away and breathe His name," and the situation becomes more bearable.

Presence. Emmanuel. Think upon these things.

Autumn

October 25. Two months until Christmas.

It's still 70 degrees here, so I expect we're all a bit unprepared, a bit un-adjusted. One day we could wake up to snow. This is Wisconsin, but even for here, this is bizarre weather. I did have a few fires on cool mornings, but overall... it's been warm.

It's time to change the photo on the top of the blog. The zinnias are about done. Not frozen yet, but I think they dried up. We've had a very dry fall.

The squirrels are in full preparation mode. I detest squirrels. They dig and bury items that sprout, and they eat all the bird seed. Rats with bushy tails. As I sit at my desk I see them all over the place in the trees.

The bird bath is the center of activity. I've never seen this before. There are quarrels at the bath as to which robin should flutter about in there first. Truly, there are a half dozen robins who are quite intent on cleaning up. They jump in and almost roll... fluffing their feathers every which way. And they're huge. Big fat robins. Are they readying to fly south?

Staring out the window is a huge temptation when your backyard is a woods. I love it. I feel my blood pressure lowering.

Yesterday a couple and their mid twenties daughter returned to church. Hadn't seen them for a while. Their thoughts were turned towards God last week when their 21 year old son, their baby, died of a drug overdose. Are there words to say? I hugged each of them tight.

As *problems* have arisen since then, the irritations of life, I've been comparing them mentally with what I *could* be coping with this morning. This is a healthy and timely reminder to me to count my blessings. And to GET OVER IT. This world ain't my home, I live here with a whole herd of imperfect people, and they're stuck with me. But I have health, relative wealth, safety, and four living breathing healthy children. Thank you Jesus.

Nothing much today. I'm just watching the robins and counting my blessings.

Young at Heart

Last Friday I was numb. A stressful week...we'll leave it at that. And so I cranked up the fire, brewed the coffee, and sat in my pajamas intent on *wasting* some time. First up was the crossword puzzle. I used to do them a lot. Now it's rare. Time. Who has enough?

I digress... So...the crossword is in the same section as the movies and the restaurant reviews. Mmmm. Delicious section that is. An article caught my eye - it contained a list of movies starring older actors, or the theme of aging. I wrote down some titles, cut out the article (which is now lost - likely recycled), and ordered a few on NetFlix.

Last night Frank and I began "Young at Heart." What an absolute gem. Here's how it is described on the Netflix envelope:

Coldplay, the Clash and Jimi Hendrix will never sound the same once you've heard the Young@Heart chorus, a group of Massachusetts senior citizens who thrill audiences worldwde with their unusual...and unusually poignant...covers of rock songs. Stephen Walker's humane and heartwarming documentary, which premiered at Sundance in 2008, follow the elderly ensemble as they prepare their latest show for public performances.

I love old people. Truly. And these spry 80 year olds are the cream of the crop. Simply adorable as they try to learn the lyrics to punk and rock songs.

I completely recommend this movie - for an entertaining, feel good, real life encounter with aging with grace. Wow. I can't wait to finish it tonight.

Another benefit... one of the women, 92 years old, is highlighted often. Her face is layer upon layer of happy wrinkles. She looks like a beautiful senior citizen version of a very wrinkly faced dog. I mean that as a compliment. Her face is amazingly layered and just exudes beauty.

But anyhow, this morning as I put on my eye cream and Oil of Olay, I actually thought...geez...you look YOUNG. Ha. That is a fringe benefit indeed. I feel like a youngster after a few hours with that group.

Rent it. And then come back to comment. Enjoy!

My own way

Precious morning time. Seated at the dining room table with my pumpkin coffee, my iPad Bible, our new Bible study book -Beth Moore's "David: 90 Days with a Heart Like His," my journal and my colored pens. And on this kinda sad, tired, slightly overwhelmed feeling morning, God sliced right through the centuries to speak right to me. 1 Samuel 8:1-22 is the text. Israel wants a king, which so saddens the prophet Samuel. They want their way, not God's way A couple of Beth's observations speak deeply to me.

"One lesson speaks of patience. God had already planned a king for the people. Their lack of patience was to cost them dearly. If they had waited for the Lord's choice instead of demanding their way, how different might the story have been?" (p. 47)

I had never thought about the fact that of course God already David picked out, the king in the lineage of Jesus. Patience. God has a plan. The best plan for all involved.

"Often when God does not readily give us what we want, it is because He knows what our desire would cost us. Faith sometimes means forgoing our desires because we trust Christ to have a better plan for our lives." (p. 47)

Yes, yes, of course. It's good to be reminded of the basics, isn't it?

I love this morning hour with God. My flexible job sometimes demands abbreviated Word time, abbreviated "journal sit and ponder time." Flexibility goes both positive and negative of course. But today, today I can get to work a bit later because I have to work bit tomorrow and Monday which are generally my days off. So today I am savoring, and pleading for an attitude adjustment in this blue spell.

Romans 5:3-5
3   And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; 4 and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; 5 and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

God always meets us when we slow to listen, and amazingly, He knows just what to say. :)

Theology

Studying Theology over here. Couple thoughts.

1. My right hand just rubbed against bare wood on the desk as I wrote review notes on an index card. That bare wood is from my father's hand rubbing there as he wrote 50 years of sermons at this desk. That just warms my heart. I've been missing him lately.

2. I wanted to share the definition of Verbal Plenary Inspiration. (the Trinity Evangelical Divinity School view of Scripture) That description is derived from 2 Tim 3:16

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

All = plenary = the whole of Scripture

Scripture = verbal = The words themselves are inspired

God breathed = inspired = exhaled by God.

The Bible is the result of the creative initiative and action of God.

Stream of Consciousness

There are so many blog posts rolling around in me as I journal, and yet of course my to do list is longer than my day, preventing me from pouring them onto my keyboard. But, what the heck, I'll write a little here and there.

HELLO!

Our Anna Grace is 18 today. Amazing: another child brought to adulthood. One to go. It is one of life's pleasures to see your children grow into delightful people. Many times recently I've questioned if I was cut out for four children [I'm not good with chaos] [I totally melt down at times in chaos] but truly the benefits outweigh the exhaustion. [I'm in the exhaustion stage of life] Happy Birthday Anna Grace. We can't imagine a more well rounded, sweet Christian daughter than you.

What I love about Anna is that she grabs all of life - enjoys so many different activities and people, and is so content in her own skin. It's a joy to watch. [She's starkly different than her mother was at 18] [thank God] And yes, we definitely have our mother daughter face to face conflicts, but those are so a part of the normal process of gaining independence that I'm thankful for them too. We have a very honest relationship. I love my Anna Grace.

This week end my friend Kathi and I were at The Moody Church in Chicago for a 1.5 day seminar on the Middle East Conflict and how it relates to the Bible. Amazing. The featured speaker was Joel Rosenberg. My father so enjoyed his book, "Epicenter" when it was released in 2006, and would have LOVED this conference. We loved this conference, and I wish I had more time to study it. I'm hoping an elective will come along in seminary so that I can spend more time in Prophecy.

One of the speakers was a former driver and sniper who worked for Arafat. He was touched by the love of Jesus through a patron at a restaurant in which he worked, and turned his life around. Now his life is spent spreading Christ's love in the Arab world. What an amazing story of God's grace.

There are so many good options for how to spend time. And there is so much in the Word that I look forward to delving into. I wrote in my journal this morning that the definition of SWEET is when "my ought-to collides with my want-to." Studying the Word is that for me. I ought to. And I want to. Sweet.

Speaking of which, it's time to spend some time with David - a man after God's own heart. And then I need to spend a few hours on Theology - we have our mid term this week. And in between I'll be puttering around, setting the table for the big birthday dinner, making rolls, prepping for the requested chicken shrimp stir fry. The requested angel food cake is in the oven now. There are presents to wrap too. And sunshine to bask in here at the dining room table. Life today is very pleasant.

MARGIN. Kathi loves that word, and we yakked about it on our way to Chicago. What a great concept - to build margin into our days. BALANCE. Another word to chew on. And SIMPLICITY. I'm entering the stage of life where I want less stuff and not more. More beauty. Less stuff. More experiences, less stuff.

I'm singing tomorrow at the funeral of a 70 year old woman. That feels so young to me. She left behind five grand children under the age of 11. Whew. It's hard to ponder.

It's one of those days where there is just a lot swirling about in my head - can you tell? I am thankful beyond words for a Monday off. I am so glad that we have chosen over the years to have me work part time. I likely have the higher earning potential of the two of us, yet I can't express how thankful I am that we have not built a life on two full time incomes. These scattered days off keep me whole. It's my margin, creating balance in a world swirling with options. It's why we could have four children, how we could create and maintain a lovely home, how we can and could take the time to care for aging parents, and why I now can be in seminary. God has allowed me this flexibility, and for that I am extremely grateful. Each of us has different callings, different options, and different definitions of margin. I think of the verse in Psalms 16:6 "The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Indeed my heritage is beautiful to me."

[There is no time to write it now, but it is pure fact that a difficult childhood has greatly contributed to who I am, and what my priorities are. And a marriage that keeps me on my knees is the same one that allows for me to be a part time worker. God works in mysterious ways, doesn't he?]

Enjoy your Monday. Don't forget to create a moment or two of margin, and count your blessings. Lately I've been back into knitting. I knit and talk aloud to God in the morning, reciting my blessings and concerns. It might only be ten minutes, but it's really helping me to stay focused on prayer. I'll post a photo of the latest project soon...

Well, this post is really all over the place. So is my brain. Welcome. :}

Geocaching Milestone

If you want to know more about this new crazy addiction of ours, there's a simple You Tube explanation at www.geocaching.com.

Coffee

Here I sit, at the diningroom table, staring mindlessly at the zinnias in the foreground and the woods beyond...about to journal, read the Word, and then ready for a few hours at work. The world is still and calm...for the moment.

As I sip my coffee, I smile at the thought of Sweet Sue.

Sue was here for a bit on Saturday (we had not been together since end of June - that summarizes my summer - Sue is one of my absolute joys) and I enticed her to stay by offering a fresh cup of coffee. I was readying for Homecoming photos and making cookies to serve the kids, and Sue was ready to run some errands on her way home, but a cup of Caribou straight from the Keurig will lure ANY coffee drinker to stay a few more minutes. Anyhow, Sue made some comment about half and half...something like... people might *say* they love their coffee, but if you don't have half and half on hand... you're just not a real connoisseur. Ha. The intent was not that black coffee is not a *real* delight, but that if you add cream... it must be half and half. She went on to tell me of recent experiences in homes with skim milk and with evaporated milk...

Sue and I are serious about our coffee.

And so, this morning, as I stirred in my half and half, a smile spread across my face. Times with friends... priceless, aren't they?

Hello Autumn

This morning after depositing our two youngest at high school and my sister at the airport to return to Vancouver, Canada, I decided to treat myself to a Starbucks Latte. And guess what?! Pumpkin Spice Lattes are back. WOO HOO. It doesn't take a lot to make my morning. (the photo is actually a latte from Alterra at the lakefront, where one can admire the foam art...)

I have fallen off the blogging boat since returning from Paris. Maybe real life isn't as fun to report on. Or maybe 2010 has turned out to be the fullest year of my life with little time for blogging. Or maybe both.

Phoenix in February, Paris in April, New York in July, Columbus in July, and a dozen day or overnight trips to Little Towns, Wisconsin in between. Whirlwind. Wonderful.

I'm going to say I've been too busy enjoying life to write about it. But then, my journal is bursting... so I am writing. Maybe the issue is that I prefer pen and paper to computer keyboard, especially after being attached to my computer all day at work. Maybe the issue is that I've had all four kids around a lot this summer. Or maybe, could it be, that I'm older than I used to be? For whatever reason, I tend to go into a coma earlier each evening than I used to.

Anyhow, please know that I'm contemplating blogging. I'll start slow. Little blogs. Baby steps.

My sister and I spent last week end in Door County, geocaching. What a FABULOUS thing to shape the week end for two sisters who have extremely very little in common. We had a blast. I took this photo in Peninsula State Park on a trail I had never been on before. Haunting, isn't it? I love nature, I'm getting into hiking, and geocaching is hiking with a purpose. This is very good for me - physical strengthening, and a complete and total escape. More on that later. For now, the coma is setting in, so it's time for sweet dreams. Good night.

Geocaching

For our twenty fifth wedding anniversary, I needed to find a good gift for Frank. Since he doesn't really have a hobby, yet he loves keeping log books of trip mileage and stops, and since he loves the outdoors, I decided to get him the equipment to geocache. It is the perfect sport for him.

Bought the Garmin Oregon 450, a Moleskine log book, a laminated Wisconsin map, and The Complete Idiot's Guide to Geocaching. Wrapped it all up. He was surprised and delighted.

Geocaching is like a treasure hunt. You use Global Positioning Signals to locate a "cache," a hidden treasure. The website is www.geocaching.com.

We signed up. We downloaded some caches from the web site to the Garmin, and we were off.

And I'm hooked. Totally hooked. I did not need a new hobby. At all. But I am the one hooked. I am the one who has read the book and crawled the web site. It's so ridiculous.

Frank went on a business trip to Pennsylvania tonight. I persuaded him to take the Garmin and the Idiot Guide. He can find caches near him on the web, upload them, and score a cache or two in Pennsylvania. He wasn't convinced that he wanted to add that to a business trip. I coaxed. We'll see.

We spent two afternoons by the lake, figuring out what in the heck we were doing, and hunting downtown caches. I so love Lake Michigan. Yesterday was HOT and HUMID and the lake effect was nil. I was *so* hot and *so* sweaty. Today was much cooler, breezy and pretty much perfection. Oh how I love walking by Lake Michigan.

Here are some photos of the Red Hots. (that's our team name) I'm really hoping this is just the beginning of a leisure activity we can enjoy together both home and while traveling. Check it out!

Searching on the rocks
Following the Garmin
Found our FIRST cache - a micro-cache

Signed the log sheet. We rerolled the log and put it back in the cache (film container to the right) and then put it back in its hiding place.
Our SECOND found cache - it was inside the opening below - had to stick a *gloved* hand under there to feel around. ( I let Frank do that!)


As of today, we've found FIVE. We're on a roll.

My logical boy. My silly dog.

At Starbucks, loving their free wi-fi while Jake gets a haircut in the shop next door. First day home held some amusement.

Jake wandered in to my room when I got home from work, asking me about the conference and telling me about parts of his week. I told him I met "the lady." "Kay Arthur?" he asked. "Yup!" I explained that I told her about him, and that she had hugged me and signed my Bible. He asked "What kind of person autographs a Bible!? It's not like she wrote it.". Ha. That is pretty logical I guess. I explained that she wrote all the accompanying commentary. Such a kid. That really hit my funny bone since it seemed so perfectly natural to have her sign it for me.

Boomer missed me. A lot. I got home from work and he clung to my ankle. Anna needed me to move my car so she could go to work, and I didn't have the heart to walk out on Boomer, so I brought him out with me. He hates car rides. He jumps in happily, but then howls and whines. I backed into the street, Anna left, and I pulled into the garage. I opened the door, called Boomer, and he would not budge. He even ignored me, staring straight ahead. Whew. I walked into the house, knowing he would scamper after me. No scamper. I got a hot dog, and waved the treat. No movement. I broke up the hotdog and made a path from reachable to out of reach to out of car. Not a muscle moved. He was doggedly intent that I was not leaving without him ever again.

No one else was home. 15 minutes passed without so much as a movement towards the hot dog. This just cracked me up since he so dislikes the car and so loves hot dogs.

Boomer just isn't himself when I'm gone, and I must admit I've abandoned him a lot this year. He was paying me back. Frank and Jake arrived, and Jake hauled him in on his leash, stating that dogs do not have enough reasoning to associate cars and leaving. Hmmmm. I beg to differ. Boomer knew.

It's good to be home with my logical boy and silly dog!

A decadent day

Hello from the Embassy Suites in Columbus, Ohio. Tonight is my fifth night here, and I am staying until Tuesday. I have an air conditioned-as-cold-as-I-want-it, two room sweet suite all

to myself, and I am soaking it up.

I attended a three credit class here at a Trinity extension: Xenos Christian Fellowship. [by the way, if you google that, you can get to pages and pages of downloadable teaching from years of great speakers] The class was entitled "Theology and Practice of the Spiritual Life." When I saw the description in our Trinity Evangelical Divinity School catalog, I knew I had to take this course. Then I discovered that it wrapped around a conference here with an emphasis on Bible study and Bible teaching. And the cherry on the top of this delightful treat? Kay Arthur was one of the featured speakers for the Summer Institute conference.

Meeting Kay Arthur is was on my bucket list.

We arrived Wednesday - about 25 of us in the class, and thousands for the conference which began that evening. To my surprise Kay Arthur was in the audience for the Thursday morning lectures. As soon as I saw her I made a bee line over to her, gave her a hug, told her I was a groupie and got my photo with her. I told her the story of how when Jake was a preschooler he would watch Barney on TV and then announce, "It's time for the lady!" He would play in the family room while I watched Kay for an hour and took copious notes while paging through my Bible. She ignited a passion for God's Word in me that has not and will not subside. She is one of my Spiritual mentors.

During her talk she told us she is 76 years old. Hmmmm. Would you ever ever guess that? You would not guess it from listening to and watching her, either. She was all over that stage, and her energy and passion were unparalleled. I will tell you that she is *very* photogenic. She looks a bit older up close and personal, but gosh... God is keeping her young and spry.

What a thrill for me. I bought a brand new leather Inductive Study Bible, and had her autograph it. She wrote,

"Grace dear ~

May this be your treasured tent of meeting with God - Exodus 33:7-14 and 2 Timothy 2: 1-7. Love, Kay July 23, 2010

It brings tears to my eyes to read that. I taught the pentateuch, and remember being so touched in Exodus with the tent of meeting, and how Moses lingered there. I remember teaching that each of us could enter the tent - that God awaits us.

The intense three days ended yesterday. Afterwards I was mentally numb, but managed to review some homework assignments, and organize my millions of notes. I shopped a bit - the puttery aimless kind of shopping that you only do on vacation. And then I slept. A lot.

Today I did one of my homework assignments. This is the description:

The observance of a three hour focused solitude. Find a time and a place that will provide for uninterrupted attention on the inner life. You should take a Bible and perhaps a journal but that is all. Prayerful meditation on Scripture and Spirit-led examination of the heart should occupy virtually the entire time of solitude. it will be important for you to be very intentional about how you will use this time. Don't be afraid to have something of a plan in place ahead of time. Be prepared to adjust your plans in response to the Spirit's direction but do not enter into the solitude with no sense of how you plan to use the time. The solitude should take place after we have discussed solitude in class. Write a one page report on this experience telling how the time got spent and what possibilities you see for the observance of similar solitudes in your future.

I find it hard to imagine a homework assignment that I'd prefer doing. My report is below.

So much to blog about. My blogging has petered out since Paris - so sorry. But I'll be back. Life is good and full and I am so blessed. Blessings to you all. -g

Preparation: Staying in Columbus for a few extra days allowed me needed conference decompress time, and an opportunity for the observance of this solitude. The night before my planned solitude I read from The Gospel Primer, noting on paper a list of verses to ponder. This included a few whole chapters, so I was secure that three hours would be filled. I am also newly convicted to use M’Cheyne’s method to get a broader sweep of Scripture. (I tend to take small bites and chew them long and hard!) This incredibly user friendly daily application was previously downloaded to my iPad but never started, so I wrote down the Day One chapters on my note pad. The morning of the solitude, I showered, ate, sorted notes, and cleaned up my room in preparation. I reread my notes on the lecture “Against the Flow.” I put my Blackberry and laptop in the front room of the hotel suite, and set up my supplies in the quieter back room. This included my (brand new) Inductive Study Bible, my colored pencils and pens, and some blank pages of notebook paper. I readied with a water bottle, tissues, and a sweater. I began. More days than not I spend an hour with the Lord in quiet solitude each morning at home, so I looked to this time with anticipation, and knew the time would fly.

Result: A blessed time. 11:02 to 11:18 a.m. was preparation. [Hebrews 11:6 to Mark 9:24 to James 4:7-10 to James 1:17.] 11:18 a.m. to 12:15 p.m. was confession. God had a lot to discuss with me! [2 Cor 10:5-7; James 1:17 (confessing that I really don’t trust that He knows what is *good* for me); and then all of James 4.] I found that most of the sins that God was bringing to mind were dealt with in James 4. I thought I was done and then asked Him again (and again) “What else Lord?” 12:15 to 1:40 p.m. was spent on M’Cheyne’s four readings. LOVED IT. Then I still had time so I went to Romans 5, because I had noted that Milton Vincent said that Romans 5 saved his life. (page 94) What a rich text. Preaching the Gospel to myself. I began to outline a teaching for an upcoming retreat on verses 3 to 5. Verse 5 brought tears as I realized how much I need to rehearse to myself that God loves me and pours His love into my heart. The retreat teaching took me to Deuteronomy 30 which God has given me as my life message. I had never used it attached to Romans 5:3-5 so I loved that. At 2:25 p.m. the Amen. I truly love being in His Word.

What I learned: I’m really practiced at the solitude, the journaling and the Bible intake. It is completely natural. Yet I realized that I read the Word with teaching in mind. I would like to have my guitar and a few songs to add to my worship in this time. Or perhaps Scriptures that go over the attributes of God. I need more worship and adoration. (How do I turn off the teacher in me?) I also realized that having my Blackberry OFF and the internet connection OFF is key. I realized that recently my daily morning hour with God has included dealing with some outside influences delivered through technology. I plan to incorporate M’Cheyne into my morning hour which will mean moving *lesson study* to another time. I will aim for a three hour solitude once a month, and put the next one in my date book each time. A full blown retreat like this luxurious six nights in this hotel once a year will also be my goal. I LOVED THIS ASSIGNMENT, and I learned a lot about my habits and how I can further sweeten my times with the Lord.

New Design...New Post

Wow. This new background template should wake us all up! Whew.

It's me! Yes, I'm alive and blogging. As usual there are about 50 blog posts in me, but let me start with observations on John 6. If only I had the time to sit and write and write...

As I am preparing to lead a study in John later this summer, I'm re-reading this Gospel in the New Living Translation. One morning recently I read John 6:16-21. The familiar story of Jesus calming the storm held some new realizations for me.

John 6:16-21 (NLT)
16 That evening Jesus’ disciples went down to the shore to wait for him.
17 But as darkness fell and Jesus still hadn’t come back, they got into the boat and headed across the lake toward Capernaum.
18 Soon a gale swept down upon them, and the sea grew very rough.
19 They had rowed three or four miles when suddenly they saw Jesus walking on the water toward the boat. They were terrified,
20 but he called out to them, “Don’t be afraid. I am here!”
21 Then they were eager to let him in the boat, and immediately they arrived at their destination!

The first thing I observed was that when the disciples went ahead without Jesus, a storm blew in. Isn't that just perfect? How many times do we bring on our own storms by leaving Jesus behind as we row into our own plans. You can pretty much count on the sea getting "very rough" when you leave Jesus behind.

What if the disciples had waited for Him? The darkness was falling, and they panicked. They came up with a plan B because they could not wait upon the Lord. Hmmm. Know anyone like that?

Next I noticed who initiated reconnection in the storm: Jesus. He did not forget about them or think that the storm served them right. He sought them out. He walked right out to them. Isn't it comforting to know that Jesus holds us, longs for us and reaches out to us when we fail?

I love how the disciples are described as EAGER to let him in the boat. Indeed! But we can learn from that too. How many times do we beat ourselves up, saying, "If only..." or "I don't deserve forgiveness." While it's true that our decisions bring consequences with them, it is also true that we serve a merciful Lord and that we need to learn to be EAGER to get Him back in our boat. Keep a short list of sins. When you blow it, repent, reconcile, and get Him back in the boat! The sooner the better!

Finally, once they had Jesus in the boat they immediately reached their destination. I've been thinking about this lately. I have this plan for my life, and my prayers often reflect the elements necessary to achieve MY plan. But really, what is the destination? For me it truly has become Peace with God. That's my destination. What could possibly be worth missing out on that? I need to keep concentrating on our relationship, and leave the steering to Him. If He's in my boat, I've already reached my destination. I need to relax into the journey.

God's Word is simple and complex. Simple enough to read and understand. Complex enough that with each perusal the nuances become clearer. I just love that.

Good night!